Lifestyle

PETIT MODE D’EMPLOI DU BONHEUR

Holaaaaa les gaaaaaars,

Cet article est le résultat d’une volonté et d’une envie extrême, sachez-le. Je commence à l’écrire dimanche à 23h comme s’il fallait absolument qu’il fasse partie des trucs accomplis cette semaine et surtout comme si j’allais vraiment réussir à l’écrire jusqu’au bout sans m’endormir sur mon clavier.

L’idée de tout ce bla-bla un peu (beaucoup) mielleux qui va suivre, elle m’est venue pendant que je photographiais ce bouquet de fleurs. J’étais à l’autre bout de mon appart en train de me contorsionner pour essayer de faire rentrer l’intégralité des fleurs dans le cadre de mon objectif 100mm et puis je me suis dit, pile comme ça : « Putain c’est vraiment le bordel ce bouquet. Il est beau, mais c’est le bordel ». (OUI DANS MA TETE COMME DANS LA VIE JE COMMENCE MES PHRASES AVEC DES GROS MOTS) (SORRY LES GARS) Et après je me suis dit « Ah ba c’est marrant, c’est un peu comme ma vie, tiens. Le bordel, mais elle est belle. Très belle ». Alors j’ai eu envie d’écrire un petit article d’ode à la vie, d’ode à l’amour, d’ode à la joie (Coucou Beethoven!) (Non pas le chien hein) (BREF, pardon).

En fait y a pas de mode d’emploi pour être heureux hein, c’est une connerie le titre de cet article. Y a pas de mode d’emploi parce que la première chose à faire pour être heureux, c’est déjà de savoir ce qui nous rend heureux dans la vie. C’est con hein, dit comme ça, mais c’est la base. Souvent tu crois que certains schémas, certains modèles, vont te rendre heureux, parce que c’est comme ça, que tout le monde fait comme ça, que Papa-Maman t’ont toujours dit de faire comme ça, mais au final, c’est des conneries. On a chacun notre propre vision du bonheur. Et le plus souvent, on ne la connait même pas en fait parce qu’on veut pas s’emmerder et qu’on suit des routes toutes tracées. Eh oh les gars vous avez tous oublié Tonton David ou quoi ? « Chacun sa route, chacun son chemin, passe le message à ton voisin… »

Je peux vous donner des exemples simples. J’ai 28 ans, je travaille depuis 10 ans maintenant. Je n’ai pas fait d’études. Pourtant j’ai sauté le CP, j’ai eu le bac avec Mention Bien, je faisais allemand, chinois et latin, bref, ma grand-mère me voyait déjà faire Polytechnique et puis finalement la vie a fait que j’ai décidé de partir à l’étranger après le bac pour une année sabbatique et les choses se sont vite enchaînées, j’ai eu des opportunités, je suis rentrée dans le monde du travail. J’ai toujours kiffé à fond tout ce que j’ai fait. Mais il y avait toujours cette petite voix dans ma tête (celle de mes parents ? de ma grand-mère ? de Dumbledore ? du monde entier ?) qui me poussait à reprendre les études parce que c’est la normalité de faire des études. Alors j’ai essayé plusieurs fois de faire des L1 à distance, en même temps que mon travail. Mais j’abandonnais chaque fois car en fait, j’en avais pas envie. Et ces dernières années, j’ai encore souvent eu des voix dans ma tête qui me disaient que quand même, ça serait cool d’avoir un diplôme. J’ai souvent été mal à l’aise quand les gens commençaient à évoquer leur parcours et quand on en arrivait à me demander « Et toi ? T’as fait quelle école ? » (Heureusement j’ai toujours ma super blague « Oh moi j’ai fait l’école de la vie ») MAIS AUJOURD’HUI LES GARS, JE DIS STOP. J’ai pas fait d’études mais j’ai fait d’autres choses. J’ai appris beaucoup de choses toute seule et j’ai toujours su me battre pour obtenir ce que je voulais. Et puis vous voulez d’autres scoops ? J’ai bientôt 30 ans et je suis toujours pas propriétaire, j’ai bientôt 30 ans je suis un peu flasque mais bordel, je déteste le sport et je déteste courir à part s’il s’agit de courir après un Menu Maxi Best Of, j’ai bientôt 30 ans et j’aime manger des Schtroumphs (comment ça s’écrit oh?) en regardant des dessins animés, j’ai bientôt 30 ans et par contre là à force de le répéter dix fois dans cet article BA OUAIS CA ME FOUT LE CAFARD D’AVOIR BIENTOT TRENTE ANS OHLALALA !

Voilà, ce que je voulais dire c’est qu’il n y a pas de schémas pré-définis que vous êtes obligés de suivre. Aucun. On s’en branle, les gars. Le seul truc qu’il faut suivre c’est le truc qui vous prend aux tripes quand vous vous levez le matin et qui vous donne envie de sortir de votre lit. (Moi perso c’est les oeufs brouillés et le bacon) (CA VA JDEC)

Je sais pas à quoi il ressemble votre bonheur mais le mien il est très simple, il se cache dans des choses simples. Alors oui quelque fois, je suis comme tout le monde, je suis frustrée pour des conneries. Je suis frustrée quand c’est la fin du mois et que ma carte passe plus quand je veux commander un couscous royal sur Allo Couscous. Je suis frustrée quand j’ai envie de me faire une raclette mais que je ferme déjà plus le bouton de mon pantalon depuis trois semaines. Voilà, ma vie elle est comme ça. Mon compte en banque est toujours un peu trop vide et mon ventre toujours un peu trop plein. J’aimerais m’habiller chez Gérard Darel mais mon banquier m’a dit ok pour Gérard mais pas pour Darel. Voilà, c’est la vie, c’est comme ça, c’est pas grave au final car les choses qui m’animent vraiment dans la vie c’est ma soif d’apprendre (ma soif tout court aussi…) (PARDON), c’est les gens extraordinaires avec qui je fais des choses ordinaires, c’est tous les moments heureux que je crée chaque jour, qui durent quelque fois que quelques secondes mais qui restent gravés dans ma mémoire pour toujours, c’est de finir quelque chose que j’ai commencé et de me dire « I DID IT! » (ba ouais je pense en anglais, not you?), c’est d’écrire pour raconter n’importe quoi mais pas à n’importe qui puisque c’est à vous que je me confie depuis 7 ans à travers mon blog sans jamais vraiment savoir à qui je me confie (vous pourriez me confier des trucs un peu aussi hein ça serait sympa !), c’est d’avoir le dernier Kinder Bueno, c’est de me réveiller pendant la nuit et de voir qu’il me reste 3 heures à dormir, c’est d’avoir le feu qui passe au vert sans que j’ai besoin de m’arrêter, c’est de voir le même visage tous les matins au réveil et de me dire que j’aimerais voir ce visage chaque matin de ma vie (bon, quelque fois, le premier visage que je vois le matin c’est le cul de mon chat…) (mais pour la poésie et le romantisme de ce paragraphe on laissera de côté ce détail), c’est le bruit de la pluie sur mes fenêtres quand je suis sous ma couette, c’est la sonnerie de mon téléphone qui me dit que quelqu’un pense à moi (bon souvent c’est le service client de SFR qui pense à moi mais bon c’est gentil quand même hein). Bon, une bonne grosse soirée raclette, ça m’anime aussi pas mal hein. C’est bien tout ce blabla niais mais au final, le fromage fondu, ça reste quand même plus important que tout le reste.

Je voulais dire plein d’autres choses mais cet article fait déjà 1200 mots et je crois que potentiellement vous avez déjà tous décroché au bout du premier paragraphe. Alors je vais aller me coucher hein parce que, sérieux, ça aussi ça me rend heureuse ! DORMIIIIIIIIIIIR ! Et quand le réveil sonnera et que j’aurais envie de le foutre par la fenêtre je repenserai à toute ces belles paroles de ce soir et je me dirais « ouais, genre ça t’anime de sortir de ton lit un lundi matin de novembre sale mytho… » PUIS J’IRAIS BOUFFER DES PANCAKES ET TOUT IRA BIEN.

Des bisous ♥

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